Okay, it is happening, just as I anticipated; my blogging activity is just as lame as it was before I committed to chronicling (That's an awkward word, if it is even a word at all.) my Tecfidera journey. WVU, my favorite college team and one of my Alma Maters, played in the Liberty Bowl yesterday and demanded my attention. With husband and his good friend (and WVU buddy), we huddled around the big screen downstairs to "tailgate" with our Mountaineers. It was a heart breaking couple of hours, full of ups and downs, nacho chips, cold beer (Yep, I was a bad girl, but did my best to keep things under control.), and comraderry (I have spell checked over and over again and I cannot find the correct spelling of this word, but I know it is a word!)
Anyway, here I am again after taking dose thirteen and on the last day of 120mg installments of this new and mysterious MS treatment. I am very nervous about "upping" the dose tomorrow to 240mg twice a day. I want to have faith in this pill so badly, but after living with no meds for three years and still functioning, I am just not extremely excited about filling my body with chemicals. I've read and shared the data, but it's rather ludicrous to throw all of your faith into studies comparing chemical and placebo use. Of course, there is probably no other way to conduct these studies. I just find it unnerving to compare written words to the actual human reactions.
Yep, I'm rambling, but I am no longer flushing. Will that happen again when I double the dose tomorrow? If MS is nothing else, it is extremely unpredictable, making it terribly exciting. Right?
When my family zip lined during our vacation a few years ago I was elated to participate in such an extreme sport. That was exciting and so not like me. Can I compare my zip lining experience to living with MS? Because I would love to say that MS is not like me either, but MS is me. MS has made me re-evaluate my life. My mother is constantly talking about "one of these days" and I suddenly realized that every day is actually "one of these days". I have to stop putting off what I can accomplish today. So, I zip line and would actually like to do it again. This time through a National Forest. There are several things I would like to do. Oh, this is the eve of New Year's Eve, so I suppose it is a good time to talk about those things I would like to do.
Because this is so spur of the moment, my resolution list may require future editing, but here goes:
* Find an agent for my nonfiction guide to living with MS. (Spoiler alert: The title is Bruised, but Not Broken)
* Retire from teaching (still up in the air about that one)
*Remodel the bathroom and put new carpet in my bedroom (So, very, very materialistic)
Enough...bored all ready!
I'm burning daylight hours with this nonsense any way. I have a WVU basketball game to attend and a little time to spend with my gal pals after while. I promise to be a good girl today and to enjoy every single second.
See you tomorrow.